not right

when i said lab was depressing on the last post, well i was hoping that it will get better. but it ended up worse.
my bacterial stock cultures that i kept in the freezer for further tests and also as a backup incase the ones in the plates dies off seemed to have some problems.
when i tried sub culturing it (reviving it back) into a new fresh broth last 2 days ago, half of it shows no growth. i tried adding more again yesterday, and today that half of it shows no growth at all.

the other half that could grow suddenly didn't show any signs of growth after i sub cultured it for the second time. i did the second time to ensure that it will be active and all..but why no growth?

it's already near the end of the experiement and my bacterias showing no growth? i was praying and hoping that its not dead like how my SV said it might be..

with my friend not talking to me, possibility of bacteria dying, group mate's being an ass, lab session could not get any more depressing.

i was on the edge, i was thinking of throwing everything away, go back home, get new wheatberries, calm down, get back to uni and start all over again.

it's like the wheatberries crisis all over again. i guess i need to be more patient..

they said

going to lab nowadays is like depressing

they said my friend there doesn't wanna hurt my feelings.

y u so stupid?

by doing this, you're hurting my feelings. why can't you be more sporting a lil bit? we're just friends, you're like my buddy. geez

just because someone's getting engaged soon in a year's time it doesn't mean cutting off our friendship just because i'm a girl. not even a smile from you. all i saw was pretend to not notice me that i was there.

if you want it, fine then.  i can't stand seeing it.

change of behaviour

i realised that i've changed drastically.
i noticed that i seemed to be bad mouthing people behind their backs more often now..
and i once randomly scolded a random person who offended my by throwing fireworks towards my classmate. yeah well serves him right. but to go to that extend, definitely not my style. i could only stare at the person last time..


i.must.go.back.to.what.i.am.previously.

classmate.bestmate.team manager.team member.a person that i could fool around with without being embarrased. is still not talking to me. =( why you no want to talk to me ya?

missings.

nevermind, it is not important anyway thankyou

regarding this thing where..oh, nevermind i gave up.

no, really. it's not important.

funny thing

a person wanna be friends with me but i don't know what happened, some other person interrupted and be my friend instead.
kacau.

ijustdontwannaknow

sigh. ain't that person gonna talk to me? even after i tried talking and smiling all?

i'm tired trying to get back talking. i just don't want to lose that friendship.

and i heard stories among classmates. i'm quite sad for a small class to have groups that can't get along with each other. worse, some group even went to the extent of using and innocent person by lying to her so that their plan will never be known to another group. all because of wanting to hang out with the guys? are they like desperate or what? these people never grow up.

i would just want to go back and breathe Klang's air again. it's just too stuffy over here with so much personalities that we have to bear. *shivers*

oh wells, take it as a practise larh

bye now

i emo la

i'm not sure if i'm being too sensitive but..

we stopped talking and joking around to each other =(

miss you being there, everywhere.

i felt like you've changed, maybe i've changed or we've changed.
if we could get back to the old times.

lust

i lust for books and more books. i think there's an upcoming book fair from bookxcess in klang next week. so not fair when i'm no where near home =(

i haven't even finished all the books that i bought last few months ago. i think there's about almost 10 books. but i still want moreee.

nerd much? nope. ^^

and i should stop eating a second helping for dinner. i started doing that ever since i crave for food that klang have and kuantan don't.  i miss nasi kandar over at pelita's and plain kaya and tau sar pau =/

shit.

secret exposed.

liking and forcing to forget another person is so hard i would rather be a nun.