post-lab work

just wanna say lab work finally finished =)
i could go wash my lab coat now. but there's still the after lab works to do...CLEANING UP.

which we haven't even started. i wonder if they forgot. we're just too busy at the moment.

i don't feel any euphoria. i might just want to continue going back into the lab.

i've sent my DNA for sequencing to Korea~ like finally. that's also after much hardship (repeats of PCR). i nearly couldn't send mine if it wasn't for my SV's permission.

now i'll just wait for a week or more for the results. then it's another story. i'm suppose to have Lactobacillus (remember yakult) if it's other than that, then i'm soooooo doomed. >_<

lab's finished. there's thesis writing. my draft is like all over the place. i don't know what or where to start. so i'm sitting here staring to the space, trying to think what to do.

now i'm getting worried for getting a placement in any companies for my internship program. did i tell you the SDMC doesn't take interns anymore for lab work? ai is so sad. really. when i so badly wanna go learn things at their lab, they stopped taking interns. sighs

reminder

never ever do things slow and last minute. if it's individual, try put yourself first then trying to hold back and wait for others.

now we all suffer, trying to rush, to get enough DNA from PCR.

i am so lost for words.

confession: i will want to use this last chance to do my project alone and be petty to myself and by myself in the lab so i could get back the bands i got before. i'm desperate.

i'm sorry, but i really need this chance.

selfish, self-centered, bossy, fussy, petty

now i truly misses Mrs Koh. Real bad.

so far, only Mrs Koh and my supervisor, Miss Lee are the only ones that is so petty, perfectionist and strict when it comes to laboratory work.

yes, forgive me, again, because here i go, i wanna complain, wanna release wanna blabber about lab work. thankyouverymuch.

fine. i'm petty.
i see wrong in every other people's moves.
i like to 'tegur' other people saying this is wrong that is wrong.
i demand alot during lab work.
i'm perfectionist.
no dirt, scribble, or a drop of water must be on my apparatus even though it's just a plastic.
i take no chances on contamination.
i make sure everything clean even if it means of throwing away an unused pipette tip that is still clean, BUT had been exposed outside too long.
very petty, very fussy, very demanding.

i don't know if it's a wrong way to excel in lab work especially to sensitive work such as DNA but to me, my eyes, and my mind, all i know is that this is the correct way.
tell me if i'm wrong. then i shall see.

a person says i'm demanding. i uses just washed, clean, plastic surface to put my DNA mixture on top before loading it into the gel instead of a parafilm, that is sitting outside on the table, with dusts and what not that sticks to it. i don't say it's wrong. it's fine, the lecturer's been using it too. it's just that in my opinion, clean surface is better to reduce contaminants.

this is parafilm, to seal things

this is the agarose casting gel ( i think it's called that) to make gel.

the plastic that i use

groupmate's irritated with me, yes i know.
i mean, who likes being told at, saying what you did is wrong and this is right, breathing down your necks when you take so much stuffs and being selfish and all? i'm selfish too in lab work. who don't.

or i just can't work in group environment. i don't know. we've been doing PCR for about 3 times already. some got the results that we wanted but not all of our samples succeeded. we failed most of the time. i just wish when we're doing it tomorrow, it'll be better because we did it under our SV supervision. the other failed attempts was during her absence.

like i say, if truth to be told, if truth to be spilled, i dare say, from what i think and what i feel is right according to what i see and think, that some of them is just so slack in doing lab work.
i know it's their own project, but since we're sharing those chemicals, their carelessness will contaminate it and those who are using it will be affected as well.
i did it individually (without them around) the day before, and my SV was at the same room as she was having class. (yes, i was doing my work when lessons is on). she saw and observed and explained to me things like to always have the chemicals on ice where every i go. when i said this to some of my groupmates, their faces turned black (that's from my POV). must be thinking why so busybody huh?
so fine i shut up (but i can't really control my mouth from opening again) and let them get their own consequences or in other words, learn by themselves. i doubt they will.
they slack, not being careful, can't stand tiredness, too weak, not so dedicated, not enthusiastic.
when the SV came today, and supervise after all those failures, truth to be told, i feel gleeful. yes, glee. i'm not lying or being nice now. i wanna smirk, and laugh at their faces (there's one that i soo wanna do) and say TOLD YA SO. i tried helping by correcting. i'm not good at explaining or talking. you don't wanna hear, accept, done. you lose.
the SV 'tegur-ed' every single things that she told me the day before. all those petty things that i did, they don't, and think i'm demanding.

and truth be said, in my facebook status, i said "if only Mrs Koh is here to see all these. no one will survive with her perfectionist attitude." it is directed to those people. i'm positively sure one person will die by the first hour of lab with Mrs Koh. her measurements taking even just using a measuring cylinder is all wrong. if they don't get it. i'm pretty sure they will from the comments below. if not, that few person is so damn thick headed.

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that's one thing.


i know part of myself. i know i can be selfish, i don't like sharing things, i put words in people's mouths, and one big thing, i love to point fingers at other people.
especially lab work.

if we share, it might be another person's fault because it might affect mine.
if we do things for each other (helping out in lab work) it might because of them too it didn't work out. (i don't say helping is bad, and not being thankful for people who willingly helping. but for those who don't even take precaution steps and don't know what they're doing and wanna help, it might be their fault).
i uses lecturer's name to back up what i said during the times i tegured what's right and what's wrong. i didn't lie. it's correct, it's just that the was i said it was like "you can't do this, or it's not like that because this so and so tell me yesterday/before".
i lurve (noted l.u.r.v.e.) to pin point fingers. yes. i had no back up explanation, because i myself agrees. i didn't see this as part of the wrong me, until one particular groupmate who got pissed off, say it out loudy right to the face saying it as though a joke, but the true intention is not just a joke. i'm lying if i say that i just laugh it off. i put on a straight face throughout the ordeal, laugh, and continue to talk and be friendly, being not offended. but deep down, i admit, i'm about to cry (well, not always you have someone telling you something straight at your face no?), and it affected me till now. and i know it's one thing that i won't forget for a long time.

sorrylarh you people got landed on someone so petty, perfectionist like me (sarcasm).

like any human thinks they're right, and everyone's wrong, i hereby saying that i did what's best for me, and i will continue being 'demanding'. while you people, you careless, ignorance people, shall go with your ways. like the hell i cared. period.


i don't say i have the most better FYP project than them, but in serious lab work situation, i excel more.

p/s: i soooooo wanna have that few person read this, feel the pinch, and get lost.

"gone la you"

after months for not wearing earrings, i try again to poke it through the earlobe to check if the hole is closed like i always did since the past 2-3 years ever since i had weekly trainings.

but this time, the left one really closed off. i panicked. everytime i checked i had this scared feeling.
i panicked and try to find the hole only to have an inflamed earlobe, and a closed hole. then i googled "what to do if your earlobe hole closed". really. seriously.

i thought of asking a friend to poke it for me. i thought of just giving up and waited till i get back to have it re-pierced, then get scolding cause i've been warned all the times that if it's closed, i'm dead meat.

my sister knows this so she said, "gone la you".

so i try poking it with the earring, it did. then now i have this small plastic thing sticking out at the hole so that it won't close anymore.

i'm so freaked out, i'm impressed that i finally got the guts to poke through a skin (thin one btw), and thankful that the hole opened again.

the same age

my cousin of the same age recently got married. congratulations, Patricia =)
i like how she arranged her wedding dinner, so unlike those normal chinese weddings. it's romantic and nicely put out.

then, my dad seemed to accidentally mentioning saying when i'm going to grow up, be independent, think for myself. and then he'll add in "see other people get married already" for a few days right after the wedding. man, if he's trying to dig out to see if i have a boyfriend already or not, dad, sorry to say, nobody wants me. lol

let's just hope my dad will forget this on my next holiday. and nobody EVER mention this thing in front of me. EVER.
let me finish my studies, practical, graduation, getting work, and maybe continuing studies again and do what ever i wanna do first. i'm not that eager. i think marriage scares me.

thankful

told ya i did a crazy thing.
but it turned out right in the end.
i'm one happy, satisfied person. =)

though i missed out the last 2 days of the competition but i had fun for the first 5 days. 5 days is better than 2 days rite?
i will definitely miss those tiems where we run under the heavy rain, seeing me having ice kacang to myself after my game when theirs haven't, sleeping together in the bus, having locked out of the room and having 4 person sleeping in a 2 person room, inventing stuffs together, making a game as though it's a football match.
thanks for the memories =)

not everyone is in as they haven't reach to UKM.
we're killing the time while waiting for our call to enter the stadium.

the science fair is fun too, not to be forgotten. thought i only have1 day duty, so it wasn't that busy. all we did was to entertain the people who came asking about the microbes, the art, the soft toys that my group sew ( i seriously had fun doing that and completing it was the best. since i've never sew a soft toy before ngee). all in all the best was those kids and adults alike, wants to try out the streaking since the catch was to get the smaller soft toys that we made as a free gift.

 the microbes that we sew. it was originally copied from Giant Microbes website

where they sells a more cuter version (and better haha)

but ours is good.

did i mention we get to keep it? ehehe

see. the smaller ones that we gave out to people.

i might've as well take arts wei.

btw, meet Lactobacillus

now, there's quiz, and thesis draft to be handed in. gotta go have some mood to do. bye now.